So I’m doing a Christmas cookie exchange with some friends.  Should be fun.  Right?  I WILL HAVE FUN.  MAKING COOKIES.

Highlights of the experience:

 – Clerk at Jewel tells me wax paper is the same thing as parchment paper.  Good thing I was skeptical.

– Start mixing, only to find I don’t have flour.  Thought I had flour.  Didn’t.

– The oven wouldn’t turn on.  The dial is broken.  I have to turn the screw thing with my hand, and guess at the temperature I’ve turned it to.

– I belatedly notice the recipe calls for “cooling racks”.  I don’t even know what these are.  I cool the cookies on plates.  (Lined up along the edge of the sink because there’s no counter space.)

– The first few cookies aren’t so much “cookies”, as bits of cooked dough hanging out around pools of melted chocolate.  The last batch of cookies aren’t so much “chocolate chip” as “chocolate uniformly diffused throughout because I left the batter on the stove while the first batch cooked, and the chips all melted.”

– After I turned off the oven?  It turned itself back on.  For real.  I turned the screw thing all the way to the left, I heard a sound like the oven turning off, and the glow went out.  Half an hour later I thought GOD it’s hot in the house.  I happened to look at the oven (because I’d left the oven door open) and the glow is on again. 

I had to leave for the cookie exchange, so I turned the screw thing all the way to the right, then all the way to the left again.  It turned off again.  I told B. I hoped he would get home soon, in case it turned on again.  Luckily it didn’t, but I don’t think I’ll quite trust it again.